Here goes my first interview this year. IIM Shillong, seventh of its kind to start, is known for its scenic campus. My interview was on 20th Feb in Institute of Hotel Management,Bangalore. I reached venue 30 mins in advance.Thanks to bangalore, auto wala I paid 100 rupees for mere 8 kilo meters.
When I reached there, there were already atleast 15 people buried inside news papers like Times of India, Hindu and Economic Times. I went there and sat in the last row. (I like being a last bench seater). After 15mins of waiting, a dude with looks like old age Ali baba came and took attendance. After 15mins more waiting, finally they called 9 people for GD inside a room and they assigned numbers to each one of us.
By the time, we entered the rooms there were 9 chairs with number plates and we went there and sat in the seats. Panel consisted of three members with an oldie(I am sure he is 60+) and two young chaps. One of them was bearing a wily smile all the time so I call him, Smily. There was one more guy who is serious enough to make you tense even at the happiest moment of your life. I will call him Pinky for his shirt color. So Pinky came and told that we have a case study in front of us and we have 10 mins to write what we understood about the case and 15 mins to discuss.
We were given a case where with the introduction of genes in pigs, we can make them digest phasphate and make their manure usable to agriculture. There are some people who are opposing this genetic transformation. Now as a member of Food commitee of the country Canada, you need to take a decision on whether to go ahead with the research on genetic transformation of pigs.
Barely I wrwote 10 sentences, Pinky told time is up and you need to start discussion. I thought I would start the discussion. Thanks to a lady on my team, before I can lift my head up from the paper and utter a word she passed 2-3 lines of gyan on the case. From this moment, GD became interesting with every one trying to make their point without worrying about if others are also speaking. This clearly gave me a picture of fresh fish market established inside an A/C room. There were couple of people who don't care of what is happening in the discussion, who is speaking. I thought I will start after this leading lady. Before I can say anything, there was already a race among three guys to become the second one to speak. Finally I got my chance after 3-4 guys fighting. I thought I will atleast give them a direction by laying out a plan and discussing around it. There was this guy who is eager to get the chance rather than listening to what I am saying. He again made the discussion a fish market. Being adaptive to the situation, i trioed to sell some of the fishes which I have for GD, I have tried hard to grab chance from fellow guys couple of times. Finally we ended the discussion when Pinky asked us to cut the crap. Mean while, i was observing oldie what he is thinking. He dropped of his glasses on table, and deeply immersed in the thought of how he can get his insurance money. We came out and I was socked when one of the guys said, it was nice discussion and every one was quiet. Mr.X, you seriously have a great chance of becoming a politician.
GD was over by 2:30PM and my interview started at around 5:30 PM. mean while, i was selling "All The best" biscuits outside the interview room. Had a great time laughing at politics, no of scams which we need to prepare and finally at our fishy GD.
I was called in at 5:30 and what followed is a mix of emotions. Read on....
Oldie: Please come in.
Me: Thank you Sir. [I went at stared at them for their permission to take the seat.]
Smiley: Have a seat.
Pinky: So what is your first name?
Me: [Damn I always get confused between what is first name and what is last name] I would like be called Trinadh Sir.
Pinky: So Mr.Trinadh, please us about yourself.
Me: [Cunning smile] Sir, do you want me to say it elaborately or a quicjk intro will do?
Pinky: [Puzzled at my response], a small one...
Me: Started with birth place,went to family,schooling,+2,extra curricular at school level,BITS Pilani, dual degree,Cisco,D E Shaw,Innovation labs and then hobbies.
Pinky: Why did you get laid off from D E Shaw?
Me: [Don't you have a better question to start my interview?grrrrrr...] Sir, D E Shaw went for staff count reduction for two reasons.
1. Asset base crunching.
2. Rhodes island story.
gave sosme gyan about locking period etc.
Pinky: So how they came up with the list?Is it simply pick some random sheets of papers from the basket?
Me: Sir, It was not random. They were trying to cut the staff where they thought they can simply stop further development either for saturation of features or for no-profit generating projects. Mine was one of the projects which was stabilised in features and gave them different features.[Was expecting to give them more gyan and make them divert to my job on which I talk for hours].
Pinky is smart enough not to get diverted.
Pinky: Ok, since you have some work experience, I will go with some general topics.
Me: [Thank GOD,(no acads..hurray..but sadly this didn't happen)]
Pinky: There was a report which is coming up on recession and all of its effects on various economics. Do you have any idea about it?
Me: No Sir. I am not aware of it.
Pinky: Do you know anything about planning commission.
Me: [Whaaaaaaat..how these questions are related?????????? :X :X] Sir, they generally are the ones which layout five year plans. Apart from their, major work I am not sure of the remaing things they do.
Pinky: have you heard about pay commission?
Me: [Seems like this guy wants some commission from someone] Yes Sir
Pinky: Tell us something about it and who are the beneficiaries of it?
Me: Sir, 6th pay commission suggested some changes to pay structure of Government employees, to bring them at par with job holders in private sectors. Also pay commission, revises pay from time to time.[Isn't that apparent from name of the commission..screw you Trinadh]
Pinky: Do you know any of the work norms that they have suggested?
Me: [I don't give a damn to 6th pay commission.Dude I am into IT..not a govt employee to know in and out of the report] No Sir.
Pinky: [needs more commission] Do you know anything about knowledge commission.
Me: [Is teher anything like that?] I am not aware of it, Sir.
Pinky: [God, why the hell I am interviewing this idiot who doesn't know evena single word about any of the commissions...lemme change the topic..] So Trinadh, this is a logical conclusion of your GD, what is your stand on genetically changed crops and animals?
Me: [Ahhhh..finally some thing i can crap about..] Sir, I completely support genetically modified crops/use of fertilizers. For example, take the situation before 1966..when Green revolution was not introduced..there were poeple opposing it at that time also..but we went ahead and implemented it..and today even though population rose many folds, we are able to have food security with the limited land..
Pinky: [Ok..this guy is gaing some confidence, let's kill it] What are the different genetically modified crops/animals do you know?
Me: [ Should I tell about KFC Chicken store..which I have got long time back..no..] Sir, BT Brinjal.
Pinky: [Hurray, trapped him..now let have some fun].. Do you which company manufactures BT Brinjal?
Me: No Sir.
Pinky: Tell me about some of the problems that we need to face because of this.
Me: [Now, let me introduce you to my new Avatar, The BluffMaster] Sir, last year I read in local news papaer that one of the places in My state(A.P), got very less crop because they implemented Bt Brinjal a year before that. So we need to investigate if farming BT brinjal, will affect any of the crops in future..
Pinky: [Seems like he bought my explanation] So do you know under which ministry this will come?
Me: [ I am a born idiot] Sir, logically it should come under Food and Agriculture.[Later came to know that recently environmmental ministry is dealing with these problems]
Pinky: [Keep you logic with yourself and just tell the answer] Are you sure?
Me: Yes Sir.
Pinky: Who is the minister for it?
Me: Sharad Pawar.[Thank you sharad, even though you failed at bringing onion prices down..you didnt let me down completely]
Mean while, smily who is busy till now gazing through my certificates, woke up.
Smily: Tell me your stand on the topic.
Me: [Good morning Smily. Didn't I say that before???] Sir, I second generitically modifid crops..[and i was about to give that green revolution funda again..before smily stops me]
Pinky: [Gives a kind of look that I am done..now its your turn to have fun]
Smily: Ok, Trinadh, tell me about ur project.
Me: [My project is something related to Twitter..for Confidential reason..I am not putting up the content here] Gave him sufficient info to convince him..
Now, oldie being felt left out,
Oldie: What is Twitter?
Me: [here comes my third avatar,Mr.Enthu] Sir, Twitter is a microblogging service[Does he know what is a blog btw??] We can update our status, give comments,reviews and talk about anything in 140 characters.For eg: I can tweet"I am at IIM Shillong interview" to let my friends know that I am here for an interview[To make them understand that I am getting screwed up badly three strangers]
Smily: Do you remember anything about Software Engineering.
Me: Sir, in that course I have read about water fall model,agile model[Really?] etc etc..[These are the only two things which I remember from that course which I hated to the core]
Smily: So tell me about water fall model and agile model and tell me about pros and cons of it.
Me: Thanks to my 2+years of exp, gave some gyan.
Smily: Now tell me some examples and convince me that they are suitable for the specific model.
Me: for water fall mkodel, Windows like developement where most of the requirements will be frozen[Sorry ,Microsft guys] and gmail for Agile model.
Smily: Do you how to estimate Cost of the project?
Me: [Gave some lame answer which even a kid will give] It depends on resources we have, features which wee need to implement,licenses which wee need toacquire(if reqd), hardware..(Smily cuts me..)
Smily: How do you estimate Time required?
Me: Critical Path method..this will give minimum amount of time required to complete the project..and was about to start explaining about precedence graph etc..
Smily: [Damn, lets ask something to screw him]..Do you know anything about CoCoMo model?
Me: [Sir, I know only Docomo] Sir, I have heard about it ..but not sure..
Smily: Ok, lets go ahead with your first degree, Civil Engineering, do you remember anything in it?Or completely forgot?
Me: [ Kill me now..] Sir, I remeber the basic..but not specifiactions and formulae..
Smily: OK, now look at the beam upwards and tell me what are materials (only imp ones) used in it..
Me: Sir, it will have concrete and steel..since concrete cannot take tensile stress, we need to put steel...
Smily: Ok, now if I have 2x2x10 beam, tell me how do you calculate amount of steel and concrete required..
Me: Gave my answer, first calculate tensile stress of beam, then calculate steel reqd based on type of steel used, then calculate compressive strength provided by steel and subtract this from total comp.strength to get amount of concrete..
(Thanks to my Civi profs.. I remember atleast fundas from Civil)
Smily: Ok, on Shore near the sand there was a kid playing and suddenly he disappeared..what might be the reason?
Me: [He might have thought of attending IIM Shillong interview] Sir, since sand is a loosely coupled soil, he might have sinked into it...(before coming up with this answer, I gave stupid reasons like water might have taken him away, there might be HALLOW space benath the place where he is standing..Trinadh, which planet are you from?Hallow space ?Come on......]
Smily: [Looks at oldie..and conveys that..Mr,Grand old man of India, its your turn to play]
Oldie: tell me about the dialemo?
Me: [Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? What is that..is it a sibling of dynamo..]
Oldie: Tell me aboutr ethical dilemma
Me: Distribute the same old wine in brand new bottle..
Oldie: What is dilemma in it?
Me: Sir, I have two options of whether to tell my new company about my layoff or not..but I thought I will tell them..and I was even ready to face more rounds if they want..
Oldie: [Nods his head in disapproval]....
Me: [ Come on..its not a cooked up story to give a masala taste..take the essence of it..]Gave a sad look..
Smily: Thank Trinadh. All The best. have a candy before you leave.
Me: [God has sent you today to save me..] Thank you sir.
There I come with my favorite candy(alpenliebe) in my mouth..after a series of strikes targeted at my brain..
